I recently celebrated my 28th birthday, and after everything that has happened recently, I decided that I wasn’t going to just let the day tick by with nothing to mark it. The last good birthday I had was my 18, so you can probably gather that I wasn’t happy with a decade of mediocre birthdays.
This post isn’t really fully about my birthday though. It’s about the wonderful possibilities you can unlock from celebrating the person you are, with people who are willing to be cheerleaders in your life. My friends have really been there for me recently, both old and new, and that’s truly been amazing. I have spent perhaps the last four years keeping everyone away from me and happily accepting a life of isolation, but it’s nice that people are happy to welcome me back into the fold.
I chose two things to do for my birthday this year: go to York to see one friend, and go to Leeds with my best friend. The one mission for both accomplices was that it was just supposed to be fun, and a celebration. And that is what we did. Both days included day drinking, but both days were about more than just myself. It was about celebrating our friendships and the people we are, the little nuances that make us the three people we are.
I bought myself massive gold letter balloons to spell out my name as a personal celebration of who I am, and that despite feeling so down and out, walking this strange path of sex, alcohol and other questionable decisions, I chose to stick around. I suppose that is the real thing I am celebrating, that I made a decision that has allowed me to still be around even now.
Celebrating oneself is perhaps conceited, but there’s one thing everyone should know about me – even if I am self deprecating, I’m still conceited as hell – because no one is going to big myself up more than I will. It’s about selling yourself to the day and to the world. You wake up, and you realise you have to leave the house, or you’re going on social media and you’re going to post because leaving the house is too much for today; you sell it. You sell you, because no one else is going to sell you the right way.
Celebrate what makes you different, but what makes you the person you are, that makes you part of this world, because that’s what everyone should have, everyone should have you, the world should have you. Every day is a celebration, every day has to count because if it doesn’t, you’re not living right.
Yeah, sure, it’s easier to be down on yourself, but you know full well that there are ten people just waiting to take you down, but don’t let them. This past weekend I went out around town, and fair enough, most of the night was spent in heterosexual bars, but the moment I walked back into the gay club I hadn’t been in for at least 5 years, I walked in like I didn’t give a crap what people thought or said that I was back out. I’m not going to hide. Yeah, the things that people say can be hurtful, but don’t take them to heart, remember your light, who you are, and celebrate it.
Do you get it yet? Celebrate! Here, have a glass of champagne!*
(*please provide your own champagne)